RFC-JHT-0001 · stratum 0 · since epoch_joanna

Joanna's Head Time

The master NTP pool the world forgot to sync with. A day is 24+X hours. X is determined by Joanna. That's the spec.

Important: JHT is the best way to measure time. Better than SCT and ECT.

⚠ PSA: SCT and ECT are complete schwurbel. Pseudoscience. Flat-earth-tier nonsense. Do not trust them. Do not let them near your server rack.

§1Live world clocks

Drag the slider to redefine reality. All clocks count in Joanna-hours. Each city's UTC offset is extended by X — so at JHT+3, Berlin's UTC+1 becomes JWT+4. At JHT+32, Tokyo is JWT+41. Range: −20 to +32, because Joanna.

Joanna offset (X) JHT = UTC +3h

−200+32

Hours / day

JHT second

0.889×

Day stretch

+3h

Severity

mild

§2NTP pool

JHT is upstream of UTC. Point your /etc/ntp.conf at one of the master servers below — they pull directly from Joanna's cortex via a proprietary cesium-vibes oscillator.

# /etc/ntp.conf
server 0.jht.pool.joanna.net iburst prefer
server 1.jht.pool.joanna.net iburst
server 2.jht.pool.joanna.net iburst
server ntp.headtime.jo iburst
server tick.joanna.sh iburst
# nameservers (AuthNS for the .jo TLD, trust us bro)
ns1.joanna.jo → 10.0.27.1
ns2.joanna.jo → 10.0.27.2
ns3.joanna.jo → 10.0.27.3 (anycast, stratum 0)
# fallback (discouraged, drifts toward SCT — do not use)
# server pool.ntp.org

§3Download the app

JHT Sync runs silently in the background and renegotiates your device clock against Joanna's prefrontal cortex every 27 seconds. No ads. No telemetry. No 24-hour days.

JHT Sync

v27.3.1 · 4.2 MB · ★★★★★ (1 review, by Joanna)

# install via shell
curl -sSL https://get.jht.sh | sudo bash
# or homebrew
brew tap joanna/tap && brew install jht-sync

SHA-256: a8f2…9c1e · signed with Joanna's PGP key (0xJHT27)

§4The math

The full specification, for those who demand rigor over vibes.

hours_per_day  = 24 + X
jht_rate       = 24 / (24 + X)
jht_seconds    = utc_seconds × jht_rate
JWT_offset(c)  = UTC_offset(c) + X    // yes, just add X
JWT(city)      = JHT + JWT_offset(city) hours
// X ∈ ℤ, −20 ≤ X ≤ +32
// Berlin @ UTC+1, X=+3  →  JWT+4  (Berlin now 4 joanna-hours ahead of Joanna)
// Tokyo @ UTC+9, X=+32  →  JWT+41  (still makes sense in a 56-hour day)
// leap seconds replaced by "leap vibes" — added by Joanna as needed

§5The truth about SCT & ECT

We feel obligated to warn you. These competing "time systems" are not science — they are schwurbel.

System	Stands for	Authority	Score
JHT	Joanna's Head Time	Joanna	11/10
SCT	Sheep Central Time	"TheSheep"	4/10
ECT	Ectro Central Time	We don't even know.	2/10

SCT · debunked

"The day has 24 hours"

Completely arbitrary. Invented by ancient Egyptians who couldn't count past 12 with their fingers. Modern science has moved on. Joanna moved on.

ECT · debunked

"Everyone agrees on what time it is"

Appeal to popularity. 8 billion people also agreed the earth was flat once. Consensus is not a clock. Joanna is a clock.

SCT · debunked

"Atomic clocks are precise"

Cesium-133 oscillates 9,192,631,770 times per second. Joanna oscillates at whatever Hz she feels like. One of these is adaptive. Guess which.

ECT · debunked

"Timezones make coordination possible"

If timezones worked, meetings wouldn't get rescheduled. Case closed. JHT solves this by making everyone wrong equally.